Once again with thanks to the Goalie Post.I imagine everybody has their fantasy nemesis. One player who may have derailed a fantasy season or shit the bed the minute you acquired them.
For me that player is Patrick Lalime. In year one of my keeper league I bought into the hype of the Ottawa Senators and was hypnotized by Lalime's 39 Wins, 2.16 GAA and .911 Save percentage during the 2003 season. With a near miss in the Conference Final and a roster full of young talent I thought the Sens were on their way to a monster season.
So in need of a goalie, my logic suggested why not draft the starter for the potential powerhouse in Ottawa. I was never a big fan of Lalime, but I mean Detroit continued to have success with a guy like Chris Osgood, surely Lalime could sleep his way to 30-35 wins.
Horrific performance after horrific performance ensued. The term "fucking Lalime" began to be a common phrase used in my household to the point that my wife laughs everytime somebody mentions his name. During the 2004 season I was involved in a heated race for first place. With a month to go I had a 10 point lead and with Jarome Iginla and Martin St. Louis lighting up the league, I was in good shape as long as Lalime could pull together a .500 record. Well Lalime rolled through March with a 3-6-2 record and caused so much desperation in me that I was scouring Senators messageboards (before goaliepost) to spot start the immortal MARTIN PRUSEK! Lalime finished the season 25-23-7. Martin Prusek finished at 16-6-3.
Needless to say I lost the pool by 2 points on a pair of Ed Belfour shutouts on the final weekend of the season. Is this the end of the story? No. Living in Toronto as a Canadiens fan has put me in the mindset that I have two favourite teams. The Canadiens and whoever is playing the Maple Leafs. In the first round of the playoffs I had to endure the Sens outshooting the Leafs by a margin of 2-1 yet have Ed Belfour stand on his head and Patrick Lalime break the Sens back.
But the whole season could be redeemed with a strong performance by Lalime in Game Seven. Then the performance for the ages occurred. Two slapshots by Joe Nieuwendyk from the hash marks along the boards eluded the human sieve and Lalime kicked me in the groin once again.
Here is a golden piece of Fantasy advice that I have never waivered from since. DO NOT DRAFT A PLAYER YOU DISLIKE. It will not end well.
On to tonight's games.
Colorado Avalanche @ Dallas Stars
Andrew Raycroft gets the start against Marty Turco tonight in Big D. You have to believe that JFJ thought he was going to fleece the new guy in the league like the guy in your fantasy league who bombards the newest owner with 50 deals in his first 3 days. I wonder how long it took for Ferguson to figure out that Chiarelli lifted his wallet by stealing Tukka Rask. Enjoy your vacation JFJ.
Phoenix Coyotes @ Montreal Canadiens
Another Toronto Maple Leaf "goalie of the future" Mikael Tellqvist gets the start against probable Jesus Price in Montreal tonight. This looks like a major mismatch, but the Canadiens have been playing 23 minutes a night lately, but it is Mikael Tellqvist and he kind of sucks.
Boston Bruins @ Ottawa Senators
Tim Thomas gets the probable nod against Alex Auld tonight in Ottawa. Neither are confirmed. When are the Senators going to go out and get a legit NHL goaltender? How many Cups would they have won if they had not decided to invest in a sieve (see above) like Lalime or Tyson wanna be Ray Emery? Unless you play for the Detroit Red Wings you cannot win a Stanley Cup with terrible goaltending. End of story. Look at the bright side Ottawa, at least you will not have to play the Leafs in the playoffs.
Toronto Maple Leafs @ Pittsburgh Penguins
Cujo gets the probable for God's team tonight against probable Marc Andre Fleury. The only explanation I have for Toronto being referred to as God's team is that god is testing their faith and they will be rewarded in the long run....lol, good luck with that.
The Martin Broduer's @ Washington Capitals
Who else would get the start for New Jersey tonight? Marty will be facing Brent Johnson. Jose Theodore enters year 7 of stealing money from NHL owners. In retrospect his pairing with Paris Hilton was a pretty good match. Both have been living off one thing their whole careers.
Buffalo Sabres @ Atlanta Thrashers
Patrick Lalime is the probable tonight in Atlanta. Lehtonen gets the probable nod for the Thrashers. I never wish an injury on a player, but can somebody please find a way to make Lalime the starter for the Sabres come playoff time. No city deserves to have their hopes dashed by the immortal sieve less than Buffalo, but with the history of wonderful sporting memories in Bills country it will make trips to the HSBC (or whatever they call it now) much more enjoyable.
NY Islanders @ Florida Panthers
Dipietro and his 90 year contract gets the start against Canadiens retread Tomas Vokoun tonight in South Florida. Riveting hockey in the sunshine state tonight!!
NY Rangers @ Detroit Red Wings
Likely starter Henrik Lundqvist will face off against probable Chris Osgood. I am convinced that the Wings could have won two of their Stanley Cups by hanging a shirt or using Chris Burke from life goes on in goal.
Minnesota Wild @ Tampa Bay Lightning
The underrated Niklas Backstrom is the probable for the Wild. He will be facing probable Mike Smith in Tampa Bay tonight.
Columbus Blue Jackets @ Nashville Predators
Frederick Norrena will be facing off against Dan Ellis in the Battle of Nobody Cares in Nashville tonight. Can you tell I am running out of steam? A little distracted by Hoosiers playing in the background.
Chicago Blackhawks @ St. Louis Blues
Nikolai Khabibulin faces off against Manny Legace tonight in St. Louis. A must watch to see if Denis Savard staggers on to the ice drunk like Dennis Hopper's character Shooter in Hoosiers.
Calgary Flames @ Edmonton Oilers
Curtis McElhinney gets the nod against Canadiens retread Mathieu Garon. Are we entering the Flames era of the 7 Million dollar goalie on the bench? Nah, I am sure they are just resting him, at least they have somebody to model their $35 hats.
Philadelphia Flyers @ San Jose Sharks
Martin Biron gets another chance to not suck tonight against Evgeni Nabakov and the Sharks tonight in San Jose. Both are probables.
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